Is There Sex After 60? (Navigating Single Life After 60)

“Women shouldn’t worry about the glass ceiling, they have to worry about the glass slipper.” Quote by the author of this blog. 7/01/18

My mother always told me that she didn’t believe in horoscopes until I was born, because I was born in the early part of March, which is the sign of Pisces. The picture that represents the sign of Pisces is a picture of two fish swimming in opposite directions.   Pisces are known to be good swimmers and often have problems with their feet. I have broken my foot twice, once playing volleyball as the captain of our team in college and once last year the day I moved into my present apartment when moving my son’s desk, a very heavy piece glass, fell on my foot. I have sprained my ankle, torn my Achilles tendon, and have broken various toes on both feet. Two in the last year. I also spent my childhood barefoot and to this day the moment I walk into my apartment the first thing I do is to remove my feet from their imprisonment, called shoes. Pisces are good swimmers. When I was about four years old my mother took me to swimming lessons I jumped into the pool and the teacher asked to see if I could float. I proceeded to swim the length of the pool underwater touched the rim of the pool and I swam back to the teacher. He told my mother that I didn’t need lessons.

The other characteristic of a Pisces is that they are dreamers. If we aren’t careful we can dream our lives away. It’s very difficult for a Pisces to face reality. We are tender-hearted, often, too tender hearted.   Being a natural-born dreamer I, of course, spent most of my childhood reading books that would carry me to other places, watched films that carried me away and oh my, when I first cast my eye on Walt Disney’s World. Well, it was love at first sight.

Fairy tales became my bible. Almost every Halloween I was some sort of princess. I still have a sparkly crown that I wear when asked to a costume party. I also wore a tiara with my veil when I was married. Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, and Cinderella were fairytale gods to me. Notice that all three young women were saved by meeting a handsome prince who arrived just in time to save the beautiful young maiden. Snow White was resurrected from the dead with one kiss from her prince. Sleeping Beauty was awakened from 100 years of sleep with one kiss from her prince and as for poor Cinderella, she was saved from the drudge of housework, sweeping up ashes all day and night and working for that nasty stepmother and those creepy step sisters. All these fairy tales revolved around rich, handsome princes who would always arrive at the precise perfect moment to save the beautiful young woman and whisk her away, far away, from their problematic lives to a new life, new land, and after that, THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER!

Now, I realize young boys probably grew up fantasizing too, however, their fantasies were superheroes, like Superman or Spiderman, or Cowboys or maybe they saw themselves as suave spies with beautiful women and martinis at their fingertips. Do you see the difference? These fantasies for the boys of our “over-60” generation … were men or rather supermen, who would save the world or saved the cattle and the beautiful girl from the “bad guys” These boys got to be the heroes of their stories.

I know some of you girls actually met your prince and he worked and slaved and loved you and he carried you away from the old life and he took you to his castle and you have lived happily ever after ever since. I have seen you on Facebook. Now he’s retired and you can travel the world enjoying life as it merrily rolls along.  You are the lucky ones.

Then there are a lot of the other girls. (I was in this category for a long time.)  Poor girls, they spent a lot of their lives waiting for that prince to come at that precise moment to arrive at the door with that satin pillow and on the pillow will be that glass slipper and it will fit. He will carry you off to that far away land. He will be rich and handsome and you too will live happily ever after. You can’t help it … it’s in your DNA from the 1950’s. This is actually a common problem for women born in the 50’s. Psychiatrists call it “The Cinderella Complex”

There are also, the very strong and smart girls, who ignored fairy tales and set their eyes on the future. They became doctors and lawyers and started successful businesses. Some of them got married but it was usually by accident or as an afterthought. They invested their money and bought stocks and bonds and filed separate taxes and they knew right away to have separate bank accounts. We salute you for seeing clearly and not ignoring reality.  I don’t know how you did it, so congratulations.

As for me, I’ve had to shake off that dreamy-eyed girl though the years as reality has snuck up on me and (WHAM, BAM) smacked me on my backside, usually when I have least expected it. Hello reality, there you are again to remind me that you exist. It’s okay, now I can stare right into your face as I work to pay bills, file my separate tax forms and check the balance of my bank accounts. Only took some sixty odd years but I realized the truth. The truth is that, it’s actually me; I’m really the one I’ve been waiting for, all along, all of these years. I am the one who has to rush in and save the day. No longer waiting for that knock on the door with that guy with that satin pillow and that glass slipper. It probably wouldn’t fit anymore, anyway. Now, I buy my own slippers, but they are Easy-Spirit flats with comfort soles.

Until Next Week…