- In 1970 I graduated from high school and stood facing my college dorm room located in a small college town in Iowa. My roommate was from a city in upper New York State and she was hands down the prettiest girl in the entire college.. She had long brown hair, perfect features and a perfect figure. She also smiled all of the time and was very, very nice. I had a round face, a curvy figure and long blond hair and I was shy.
(In case you have forgotten Woodstock took place in the Catskill Mountains, northwest of New York City between August 15-18, 1969 with an audience of more than 400,000, billed as “An Aquarian Exposition: 3 Days of Peace & Music” This was probably the beginning of the full-fledged “Sexual Revolution”)
Okay there I was starting college in the middle of the sexual revolution. Sure I saw it and yes, lots and lots of people were participating. My friends had boyfriends back home and loved their boyfriends back home, however, this didn’t stop them loving lots of other boys and men at college. I know girls who bragged about how many times they “did it” in one night …. the winner as I remember was five times. There was one of my friends who kept her straight A’s through college by sleeping with the professors. We partied, yes, lots of kids took drugs or at least tried them. We protested and really it wasn’t because we all cared that much about life or college or the war. Boys were afraid to be drafted, I remember that, but we really wanted to feel “IN” like the other college kids who were protesting around the country. I remember my best friend and I would go to “Dunkin Donuts” at night at closing time and the guy at the counter gave us boxes of donuts and coffee to give to the protesters for free because Dunkin donuts makes fresh donuts everyday and they simply toss the old donuts in the garbage. I think at the time we were actually protesting the food at the cafeteria for not providing us with enough healthy foods. As I remember everyone scuffed down the donuts at the food protest. Gives you a little idea about how serious we really were about our protesting.
The sexual revolution continued at a fast and record pace as I remember right into the 80’s. This revolution began, I believe, with the invention of the birth control pill along with changing morals of our parents, the glamour of the new Hollywood, the rat pack and last but not least Hugh Hefner, Playboy Magazine and the Playboy Clubs and Playboy Bunnies, with a splash of the new exciting immoral popularity of Las Vegas. Things changed and changed probably from then on. It might have begun with the beginning of a war far away in Indochina called the Vietnam War. This was a war that most average Americans didn’t understand. Lots of our young men were drafted and ended up in this strange land fighting people who had not attacked us. These men were being wounded and killed on television. Brave and handsome and wonderful young men that we all knew and loved from our neighborhoods in America. I think this also produced a feeling of “let’s live and love for tomorrow we may die.”
Where was I during this revolution? I had a strange position during this time. I was popular and somehow totally accepted by my friends in college and after, however, I felt like an outsider, watching the festivities from a boxed seat in the balcony as everything and everyone was participating on stage in the theater. Even though the rest of the world was moving along at a fast pace. I was happy and enjoying everyone’s spontaneity and freedom while keeping my own relationships very old-fashioned. Thinking back, I more or less missed the whole sexual revolution sort of standing on the sidelines and cheering others on. I understood the whole thing and I really never judged anyone else’s lifestyle. I just don’t judge people. Lately I have been thinking about the WHY behind my choices. I have decided that I took sex as a very personal thing. I had to feel as though I was in love really and truly in love to want to have sex with someone and I had to feel that this love was reciprocated. So yes, I had sex and I fell in love a couple of times, however, these were serious relationships with really great guys. I dated a lot and sometimes for a long time and never had sex. Why? I think I figured it out. I think I had too much respect for myself. I didn’t want to be just a second thought in anyone’s life. I wanted to be an important factor in my partners’ life.
Has age changed me? I’m not sure? Yes, sometimes, I think it has. Maybe sex can just be sex and nothing more. Maybe in our 60’s and over any experience is a good experience? Maybe life isn’t as serious as I once thought it was? Or, maybe, we shouldn’t take life all that seriously? Keep reading each week … and maybe, just maybe, we will find out together?
Until Next Week…