Is There Sex After 60? (Navigating Single Life After 60)

This will be my 101^st post for my blog.  Originally, I decided to write 104 posts.  Why 104?  Well, I thought that I was going to write one a week and that would take me to the end of two years.  It didn’t turn out that way.  Life came along and all sorts of distractions added to my procrastination.  Sometimes I write two a month and sometimes I don’t write any at all.  My original idea was to sort them all out and put them into a book with some added material.  I might still do that however; it is a bit more difficult than I imagined it would be.  One, I am not sure how to go about it, although that hasn’t stopped me doing anything in the past.  Two, lately, I have some new ideas and we will see where that takes us.  I think of my followers of my blog as friends or buddies who travel with me down roads, some from my past, some bumpy roads and some shiny new highways that are yet to be explored.

What have I learned?  There is a lot of life to be living right now, after 60, and in the future.  Good News! People over 60 are still having sex! They still flirt, they still think about sex, they still look for it and watch it and want it and hope for it.  So good to know!  Some have found love again.  Some have loved and lost.  One or two have married, a few are just living together … some in sin!  Some people are still happily married to their high school or college sweetheart.  Frankly, there are a lot more of these couples than I would have imagined.  Some people are in marriages and sticking it out even though they aren’t happy or fulfilled.  A few people are married and very unhappy, but they don’t know what else to do.  Surprisingly, I have talked to or interviewed both men and women who haven’t given up and they are keeping open minds and open hearts looking for the “right one”.  Sex is still on the minds of both men and women over sixty.  Somehow that fact is comforting to me. 

Now, what about work?  A lot of people have retired in their 60s and they love retirement.  Most of these seniors have saved enough to be comfortable and comfortable enough to travel.  Happily married couples with good health and money to travel, that sounds good to me!  Some people love to work and still do. I have a good friend who lost her job last year, and it was a really good job.  We both think that she lost her position due to age discrimination.  Why keep a woman in her ‘60s when you can pay someone much less money right out of college?  She was very upset when her company let her go.  I have some good news about my friend.  She had three, yes, THREE offers from other companies who knew of her past work.  She is starting her new high paying position next month. 

We have seen over 60 and over 70-year-old men and women starting new careers and loving them.  I have friends and relatives who have shown their artwork at gallery showings and friends who have written books and published them all by themselves.  There are a few people who have started new, small businesses.  One of my friends retired from an executive position and is now a radio host of several shows on a Classical Music Station.  He is enjoying his life more after 60 and after his retirement.  He is happier now.  How wonderful. 

Of course, like life everything isn’t always rosy.  After 60 we do lose spouses and loved ones and close friends.  There is illness and hardships to be faced.  In my own life I have lost family members, and friends and now I must face the fact of a dear friend who has been diagnosed with dementia.  I knew it was happening.  Sadly, doctors have recently confirmed what I had suspected.  This is one thing I hadn’t planned for in my 60s.  I don’t know why I am surprised?  It happens.  This has hit me hard.  She is a dear, dear friend and we have been friends for 57 years.  We live in different states but our friendship is as strong as ever.  We used to talk on the phone every month or two, as our children have grown up and moved on, we talked more often.  Our conversations moved to once a week.  We talk about our childhood, our old neighborhood, our family members who have passed on.  We have seen each other through some tough times.  Lately she has been calling me every day.  I know why.  I remind her of her past and what is familiar.  We still laugh and some days she is just how she used to be.  I act as if everything is the same and normal even if she forgets from one moment to the next.   I am able to write about her because she doesn’t read this blog.  I am pretty sure she forgets that I even write one.  We are buddies, now we are really just phone buddies.  I will be here and I will answer the phone and I will talk about life and about her past and her childhood as long as it is possible.  We don’t visit because she is afraid of Covid and all the variants that keep popping up.  Dementia is one of the sad realities of aging. 

So, one more thing to face.   I have a favorite phrase and I say it and I write this often, “I will keep on keeping on.”  Tonight, I will finish this and post it and I will put my feet up and sip a nice big glass of wine.  Will I keep writing my blog?   I think so.  I still have a lot to say.

Until the next time …..